If Left is Wrong I Don’t Want to be Right. The Left-Handers of Video Games, Part IV!

One of the things I pride myself on with this blog is having the most complete listing of left-handed video game characters on the internet.  A series of posts, documenting the rare representatives of the genetically superior laterality that appear in our electronic entertainments.  Kind of a silly little thing, but as a leftie myself and it being a perennially hard time finding representation of that among my chosen medium, it means something to me.  But it’s been years since I last wrote something up about this, and you know, part of having the most complete listing of anything is that you need to update it once in a while as time passes and more examples of that subject emerges.

So let’s correct that now.  The previous three posts include all the left-handers I’d personally encoutered up to that point in games, at least that I knew of.  But now, years later, I’m just as young but significantly wiser, and let’s put that updated wisdom to use, in this, an addition to the list of those characters in games who are just innately better than everyone else.

Nero-Devil May Cry

The son of Virgil, the traditional way-cooler-than-the-actual-protagonist rival character, Nero takes over main character duties from that right-handed goober, Dante, for the few most recent mainline games.  And dude is a beast at that.  See, his right hand has some devil grappling powers, letting him style on his enemies then pull them back in when they get knocked away, reaching combos that Dante and Virgil have to struggle more to achieve.  Nero heads up two mostly good games in the series out of his two shots at it, whereas Dante only has one out of his three.  Now, you could say that’s the result of Nero leading the games at a point where what makes a good DMC was more firmly established and the Capcom team was more versed in it, but we all know really it’s that left-handed blade- and gun-work that leads him to success.

Soda Popinski-Punch Out

There’s a couple of Punch Out character that take southpaw stances, but Soda Popinski, aka Vodka Drunkinski, is the only one who consistently does that throughout all his appearances, so outside of the previous post’s Super Mac, he’s the only one from the series I feel confident enough in to count here.  The others are just posers.  Anyways, Soda Popinski might not have been the first boxer to give you trouble in the old school punchout, but he might have been the first one to make you cry, with the combination of his high speed and great defense making him hard to score counterpunches on, the foundation of most of your offense.  Much like real life southpaws, his left-handed offense makes him hard to read for your weak right-handed mind, and he benefits from that greatly.

Patrick Galloway-Clive Barker’s Undying

What’s this?  We’ve finally got a second left-handed character on this list from a game that was developed outside Japan?  I never thought I’d see the day.  But here we are.

So, I’ve barely played Clive Barker’s Undying, so I can’t really hype up Patrick Galloway that much.  Instead, let’s talk about why he’s left handed, because mechanics-wise, it’s pretty interesting.  Undying is a PC FPS where you’ve usually got both a weapon and a magic spell ready at the same time.  Usually, it’s left-click to shoot, and Undying has Patrick Galloway left handed so that visually corresponds with your left mouse button.  Your right click, and his right hand, are dedicated to the spells.  It works out very elegantly.  And I really don’t know why more FPSes haven’t taken that same tack.

Those Left Behind: The Lefties of Video Games, Part III

So, while writing my last post outlining the Southpaws of the Video Games world, I ended up with more characters than I had time.  So here’s the long-awaited follow-up to part 1 and part 2 of our thrilling series highlighting members of one of the most underappreciated groups in video games, the mighty Southpaw.  Tracking down left-handed characters in games is a lot harder than one might think, largely due to how scarce we are, but I believe that with the completion of this list, combined with the other two, I’ve almost exhausted all the lefty characters in video games.  Got any I missed?  You know where the comment field is.

Phoenix Wright-Ace Attorney Series

Here’s one that’s never officially been determined, but it really does seem likely to me.  Phoenix Wright’s pointer finger is legendary.  Tell a lie in court, and it’s coming straight for you.  And it’s always his left finger, too.  Moreover, whenever you see him manipulating anything, usually his papers, he’s holding it in his left hand.  And his left arm’s used a lot more often than his right in official art.  So I’m calling it.  Phoenix may be stuck in the closet, but he’s still a member of the Southpaw Crew.

Makes total sense, as Phoenix Wright is one of the few defense attorneys able to carve out any sort of winning career in a courtroom heavily biased towards the contribution.  Of course, that is largely due to the fact that almost all of his clients are indeed innocent, but the fact that he’s left-handed and therefore part of a long history of outmaneuvering the rest of the population certainly plays a part.

Ice Climbers-Ice Climbers, Smash Bros.

Much like lefties as a whole, the Ice Climbers are vastly unappreciated.  They haven’t had a game of their own for almost thirty years, their stages tend to be a bit more poorly designed than most in Smash Bros., and even as Smash fighters themselves, they’re a bit of an odd duck.  They don’t have the raw attributes of some of the other characters, so they really need practice and study to be able to use effectively.

Still, though, considering how smoothly they went from smacking down icicles and ceiling tiles to pounding Bowser into the pavement, you know they have to have some game.  And it’s all in their left hands.  It’s their left-handedness that gives these former benign glacier scalers the power to hang with the worst of all of Nintendo’s canons.

Bowser Jr.-Various Mario Games

So, the Mario universe is really inconsistent about the handedness of their characters, but Jr. here seems to be a lefty more often than not.  He paints left-handed, plays baseball left-handed, chucks enemies at you left-handed, etc.  He’s a significant pain to deal with, and his handedness only makes him more effective at causing you trouble.

Yoshimitsu-Tekken

Back in the day, I used to think that the Tekken Yoshimitsu and the Soul Calibur Yoshimitsu were the same character, displaced by time.  The fact that SC Yoshi was a filthy right-hander was what clued me in that this wasn’t the case.  Anyways, Yoshimitsu is pretty much what Robin Hood would be if he were a ninja from space.  He’s one of the most honorable and effective characters in the game, and has proven popular enough to be a part of every entry in the series save one.  And that one entry is pretty darn bad.  Coincidence?  I’ll let you decide.

Isaac-Golden Sun

When everything starts crumbling all around you, of course people will look to the nearest southpaw to lead them through the storm.  That’s just basic survival instinct.  You latch on to the smartest, strongest, and most skillful person available to see you through, and a preference for the left hand is one of the clearest signs of those traits there is.  So it is that everyone counts on Isaac to lead the group fighting against allowing the terrible power of Alchemy back into the land.  And a good call that is.  Isaac is one of the most talented combatants on the team, being well-versed in physical attacks while still having enough skill with Psynergy to fill in as a caster in a pinch.  And sure, Isaac may have made the wrong call in being convinced that Alchemy is necessarily a bad thing before taking the whole picture into account, but Golden Sun is still a net gain for lefties, largely because of…

Felix-Golden Sun

So, as it turns out, Alchemy in Golden Sun is a necessary thing.  In fact, it’s the only force that can avert the eventual self-destruction of the world.  It’s dangerous if misused, however, and people are scared of it.  They need someone to drag them kicking and screaming into the age of alchemy, to save their own lives.  They need someone bold.  They need someone wise.  They need someone left-handed.

For the second half of the game, Felix leads the team trying to bring Alchemy back to the world.  He knows what’s up, he knows what needs to be done, and he’s not afraid to do whatever it takes.  Obviously, as a left-hander, he’s just as skilled in a fight as Isaac, and is well poised to bring his world into the new age.

Shion Uzuki-Xenosaga

Shion’s a scientist.  In a video game.  I know, I know, Gordon Freeman aside, that’s usually a recipe for a quick and dirty death, but Shion manages to stick it out, thanks to her experimental android, her unusual weapon, and the might of that left hand.  She may not be the most useful party member, but her ether abilities do keep her afloat well enough to suitably lead the party through the first entry in the Xenosaga, and keep her relevant afterwards.

Angelo-Dragon Quest VIII

Angelo is a skirt-chasing, hard-drinking, gambling swordsman.  The fact that he rises so far in the Templar Knights even with all his vices is a testament to how much his natural skill as a left-handed warrior places him above the rest.  He outperforms the rest of his kind in their darkest hour, and proves himself to be one of the most versatile members of your party.  Seriously, he’s able to do anything well, his natural handedness lending itself well to quite a variety of weapons and spells.  In fact, some may even say the game never truly begins until the southpaw swordsman joins your crew.

Marisa-Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

In the 2-d Fire Emblem games, people’s handedness was all over the place, thanks to sprite-mirroring.  Marisa was one of the few who ever made a point of their preference, and she’s very clear on that front; she’s a lefty.  A first-class Myrmidon, she’s very dedicated to the art of the sword, going so far as to sleep on her right side to always have her weapon hand available.  In most of her endings, she ends up as one of the best swordsmen in the land, stoppable by no man.  Of course, her southpaw nature only serves to give her the edge against anyone who dares face her.

Miriel-Fire Emblem Awakening

As you can tell just by looking at her, Miriel’s one of the smartest people in the Shepherds.  Sure, that image gives lots of traditional signs of intelligence: the book, the glasses, the superior and distant gaze, but the biggest indicator?  That’d have to be that she prefers her left hand.  A perfectionist, Miriel demands much of those around her, yet her performance in combat makes her fastidiousness worth it.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Yuri Lowell-Tales of Vesperia

Yuri’s actually fairly ambidextrous, switching his swords between hands as his combos and moves require.  He does seem to have a definite preference for his left hand, though.  He was probably born left-handed, but, as a common fate for lefties in a Right Power world, he was forced to adapt and learn to use his right as well to utilize stuff like school desks and scissors and notebooks and things like that.  Tales games usually deconstruct a common aspect of modern day storytelling over their runtimes and in Vesperia’s case, it’s all about breaking down the contemporary anti-hero, a role Yuri fills well.  Having a clear dark side, Yuri’s not afraid to just ice the villains the justice system can’t touch.  Perhaps his sinister handedness provides a window into his sinister nature as well?

Super Mac-Super Punch Out

Nintendo’s been really cagey on whether this guy is actually Little Mac or not.  The character’s just as cagey about which hand he prefers.  Unlike Yuri, who’s mostly ambidextrous, Mac here seems to be a clear case of mixed dominance, preferring to use different hands for different tasks.  In the boxing ring, his left jab is his fastest and far most reliable attack, and probably the sole reason why he’s able to take down foes far larger and stronger than he.  He also leads in with his left for his Super Body Blows, but the Super uppercuts are done with his right.

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And thus, we end.  Thirty-five characters, three posts worth, and we’ve gone through all the left-handed characters in the games I’ve played.  Are there more?  There might well be.  I haven’t quite played all the games in the world just yet.  I’d posit you’d be really hard pressed to find any, however.  So here, between these three posts, we may well have the most comprehensive list of southpaws in video games on the internet.

One thing that’s still really odd to me though.  Thirty-five characters, I’ve found, and only one, Doomguy, was brainborn outside of Japan.  Seriously, what’s up with that?  Is Japan the one place free of persecution against lefties?  I might have to be making a visit there, sometime soon…

Left is Right: Southpaws in Video Games, Part One

There’s been a fair bit of discussion in recent years about diversity in video games. Players are getting tired of the mid-thirties unshaven male/bald space marine/what have you protagonist that are the standard for protagonists, and we’re wanting to see more non-WASP characters. There have been calls for more women characters, more races represented, better treatment of gay characters, etc. Yet there’s been one underrepresented segment of the population that seems to have gone forgotten. Nobody seems to think to include us, to demand more representation from our populations, all the while gamemakers are seemingly forgetting we exist. We are a proud group with a very rich and distinguished history, yet we have been living with persecution for centuries, that continues to this day. I speak, of course, of the mighty southpaws.

It has long been scientific consensus that left-handers are more attractive, more intelligent, better in bed, and improved in just about everything we do than most. Indeed, experiments have proven again and again that we are everything Daft Punk ever dreamed of: harder, better, faster, stronger. Of course, you could probably find scientist out there who disagree with those findings, but they’re probably right-handed, and therefore their opinion can’t really be trusted. If you think about it, left-handers are pretty much like superheroes; we are just innately better at pretty much everything. If one were to call us the next step up in human evolution, they wouldn’t be too far off the mark. Yet, even with our obvious greatness, we find most of western culture against us. While “right” also means “correct” and “just” in English, the Latin root for the word “sinister” took on evil connotations because it referred to left-handed people. Largely because of our natural ability to circumvent many defenses against right-handed fellows, southpaws were considered treacherous and touched by the devil, which is ironic considering that we actually seem to be blessed by God himself. Even now, the Right Power movement pervades our culture, with basic tasks such as cooking, writing, and even using common school supplies made much more difficult by the fact that nearly everything is made specifically for right-handed people. In fiction, left-handers are rarely represented at all, and even when we are, our handedness is most commonly used as a sign for how evil the character is.

Of course, we do have some small representation in most mediums, and video games are no exception. The amount of left-handed characters is very small, but most of them are very significant. And usually the best parts of their own games. To follow is a bit of a celebration of left-handed characters in games, listing the most notable ones in the games I’ve played, and explaining a bit of how their natural superiority shines through.